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Why don't men speak about their mental health?

The stigma surrounding men and their mental health has been a silent killer for far too long now. Since birth, they are taught to be strong, become leaders and that expressing emotions is a sign of weakness. This makes the concept of them seeking help contrary to that of being strong and becoming unsuitable or unfit for the so-called role as a provider. It is no surprise then that men often struggle to talk about how they feel to each other or anyone in general. A stereotype? Definitely. But it's basis in fact is even more alarming. According to an ETimes Lifestyle survey, 39% of people feel that men don't feel comfortable talking about issues related to mental health.

Majority of men in our society go undiagnosed stating that they do not wish to ‘create a fuss'. On the other hand, their friends refuse to validate them when they do speak up. As a result, they are often bound, constricted and asked to ‘man up' instead of speaking out. Then, how do we even begin to give them a voice and make sure that it is respected?

Here's how-

Redefine help-seeking as a show of strength:

• Reframe help-seeking behavior as a sign of strength and not weakness. Let men know that seeking support is a good thing and that it reflects how one is committed to helping or changing themselves for the better.

Speak to someone you trust

Its common for you to think you're alone in your struggles against mental health. Chances are you've got a whole support system there for you and people who see that something is not right. A sympathetic ear is sometimes all that we need to feel better. So, if you feel up to it, talk to someone you trust about how you feel.

Avoid minimizing and judgement

Making someone's problem seem small or judging them can never be healthy. When your male counterparts open up to you, give them the safe space, encourage them to speak their heart out and let them know they have support while they work through their difficult feelings and feel better with time.

Why is it important to speak about men and their mental health?

Men and their mental well-being aren't spoken about enough. We know that most women have important men in their lives. Fathers, brothers, sons, husbands and more. Their health and what they do matters to us. They're why we need to have a conversation about mental health.

Men don't always experience the same symptoms of a mental health disorder such as depression. They often hide the symptoms of depression with anger and violence or silence which is the only thing that can be heard from them making it more difficult for their loved ones to provide them with the right kind of help and treatment. As a result, unhealthy coping mechanisms such as smoking and drinking become a habit which can lead to a number of related problems.

So if you have men in your life you deeply care about, the simplest thing you can do to help them is: start a conversation with them. Normalize the phenomenon of asking them how they're feeling and encourage them to speak to you freely or get regular check-ups with a mental health professional.

To end with, here are some small mental health reminders for all those males out there:

·      Know that it's okay to show your emotions

·      You do not need to ‘man up' all the time

·      There is help out there

·      Its not unmanly to struggle

·      Suffering does not mean you are weak

·      You are never alone

Men, you do not have to suffer in silence. Let us help you with your journey of mental health. Download our app ‘The Able Mind' or visit our website (https://theablemind.com/) to connect with a counsellor. Lighten Your Load and move forward now…Let us show you how!

Sakshi Hiremath

Consultant Counselling Psychologist at The Able Mind